Me: Rampant Threat To Copyright

So I went to a press screening last night. Usually the screenings I go to are small, comradely affairs, held in tiny screening rooms in nondescript office buildings. But last night I was seeing a big studio picture, one with a wide(r) release, which meant security goons out front confiscating anything more technologically complex than a crayon. Including my phone.

I say "phone" broadly. I have a Sidekick, and use the other functions (IM, email, solitaire) with much greater frequency. Unfortunately, the good folks at Danger, Inc. saw fit to include a camera in this years' model. It's a really crappy camera; it produces images that are nearly comprehensible if they are taken in direct sunlight from approximately six inches away. But it's a camera nonetheless, and with the MPAA's current level of paranoia, my Sidekick is camera non grata.

Factoid 1: I use the Sidekick to take notes during screenings, mostly because I like to have some idea of what I was writing when I was writing it, a feature not available with the old-school pen-and-paper gag. I can thumb-type a lot faster than I can write, too.

Factoid 2: The movie in question has been out for over six months in other countries, so leaking a still frame from the movie isn't going to be news.

Factoid 3: Security doesn't give a fuck about any of that. The MPAA may not be the brightest bulbs on the tree, but they hire good goons.

Factoid 4: ...except maybe not, since my wife got in with the EXACT SAME MODEL of phone that said goons confiscated from me.

I tried pleading with the goons ("I take NOTES with this, I don't WANT crappy pictures of your crappy movie"), reasoning with them ("The movie's been out for..."), and finally, complaining bitterly ("I should have just LIED to you when you asked me about the phone") - I knew it was all fruitless, but hell if I'm going to be treated like a presumptive criminal and not make a little noise about it. One of the goons got a kick out of me saying I should lie to him, telling me that that was what the metal detector was for. Good thing these guys didn't make the grade for airport security.

Here's the kicker: since wife got through with her copyright-infringement device, she decided to take a picture of me getting my phone back after the screening. It is included here for posterity. Get a load of the image quality and you'll see that my camera is the piratical equivalent of a wooden dinghy that's missing some planks that should, optimally, be keeping the boat from sinking.

Was a decent movie, though.


Blogger StudioGlyphic said...

Man, that picture sucks.

6/11/2005 01:33:00 AM  

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